 This is the ninth installment of "Eat This List" - a regularly recurring list of things chefs, farmers, writers and other food experts think you ought to know about. Today's contributor is the pseudonymous "Manuel T. Waiter." He's the author of the wildly popular blog Well Done Fillet, and works as a waiter at an undisclosed restaurant in Belfast, Ireland. He'll be right with you. Complaints, eh. Complaints are magical little moments that allow you, as a waiter, to look deep into the soul of the guest and see what makes them tick. You see beyond the well-dressed (or otherwise) exterior and deep down into their insecurities and paranoid psychosis. Or something, not that I want to over-think things. Sometimes a steak is just an overcooked piece of meat and not the start of a mental breakdown. But quite often when a customer complains it's less about you or your restaurant's inability to sling three appetizing courses over two hours down onto a table, and more about the punter and their state of mind. Honestly some days I know they're only one overcooked tuna away from a William "D‑Fens" Foster moment. What? "Yeah I don't eat tomato, don't like them. Never have done, they taste yuck." He actually said yuck. This fully-grown, professional looking, man of about 40, maybe 45 years old, said tomatoes are, "YUCK." I was tempted to ask if they made him sicky in his tum-tum. But I didn't. So you want a new steak? "Eh yeah...it's just the tomato..." Mmmmmkay....eh. I'll see what the chef says. He'll probably just take the tomato off though. He looked really upset, I mean it must have been a great relief to him that he had his wife with there to help him through this difficult time. She held his hand across the table as I spoke to him the way someone would as if they knew their friend was about to get bad news. Good grief. This incident saddened me somewhat. Men - they used to be more, you know, manly. I have another regular guest who comes in every single week in life with his large and raucous family. Every week he complains. Every week it's something different, and every week we deal with it. The man, in his late fifties, doesn't get to speak at home, probably hasn't been listened to in years. So he comes to my restaurant every week and complains about something because he knows I have to deal with it, I have to listen to him and I have to make it right. He rarely has grounds to complain but what are ya gonna do? We are his last refuge, his last ear, in a world that stopped listening to him years ago. Complaining isn't easy. Some people don't want the confrontation and some just get it all wrong. But it needn't be a them-versus-us moment nor does it need to ruin your night. A well-dealt-with complaint is a beautiful thing but it all starts with you explaining yourself properly. Actually, it all starts with us making a mess of things but you know what I mean. Here's the top five things to do when you're going to complain. 1. Calm down 2. Act fast 3. Be clear 4. Trust me 5. Follow up We want you to leave happy. And in the long run, it is cheaper to take something off the bill or give you a free bottle of wine than have you leave all bitter and grumbling under your breath. In 'round-about terms, the manager or waiter should ask you what they can do to make you happy and act accordingly within reason. Touching the bum of the 19-year-old waitress or 40-year-old waiter isn't an option. Most food-related complaints can be dealt with straight away by the waiter: wrong sauce, not hot enough, wrong side order, etc. These problems are solved with a quick dash to the kitchen. If the complaint is related to the waiter, my advice is to go straight to the manager. Bypass all other staff and go straight to the guy in the fancy tie. If you ask the waiter to get the manager, chances are they will know what you are up to and that's when the misinformation will start. I have never done that, oh no, not me. Waiters want a smooth shift, we want our customers to be happy, and we want them to return. More customers means more cash for Manuel. Chefs share those goals too. We don't want it to happen, we don't want you to be upset, we don't want to have to stand there in the middle of the restaurant and get a dressing down from an irate customer. You should bear that in mind before you let loose with the hairdryer rant. But from time to time, things get screwed. Fact. How we unscrew them is quite often up to you. Complaints? Share 'em in the comments below. See more of Manuel's musings at welldonefillet.com |
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I have never complained at a restaurant because I'm too much of a wuss. However, on one memorable occasion, my mother complained for me. We were in a Tennessee restaurant and I ordered the "authentic" Red Beans and Rice, which was bland and had an off-flavor. My mother thought I was just being a picky until she tried them herself. She immediately flagged our waitress, and when the chef came out, he insisted it was authentic; big mistake. We live in New Orleans, and my mother, a home cook, is from bayou country. She informed him that not only was it underseasoned, but that since it used black beans instead of kidney beans – the "off" flavor I had noticed – it wasn't even Red Beans.
The waitress was great, but the chef was a prick. I think I got a free dessert or something, but I doubt the "authentic Red Beans" recipe was ever fixed.
Once in a while, I'll have a reasonable cause to complain, but I don't usually mention it. Generally speaking, if my plate comes and it has the wrong side, I don't really care, as long as it isn't gross. If my steak is medium well instead of medium rare, that's not ideal, but it's not the end of the world, either. Servers are busy, cooks are busy, and we all make mistakes now and then. I understand that people have a right to politely complain about these things, and I don't begrudge them that. I'd rather the servers and cooks have time to handle the complaints from the people that care more about these mistakes than I do, as that contributes to a happy experience for all.
To me, whether I complain about the food depends on the place. If I'm eating a $7 dinner at a crappy diner, I'm not expecting much to begin with. On the other hand, if I've order a $50 steak (which for me only happens every few years) I'm defnitely sending it back if I ordered it medium rare and it comes out well done.
I only complain when there is a logical reason for complaint(such as getting my order wrong, which rarely, if never occurs).
Otherwise, I'm uncomfortable with frequent complainers and personally would find them worse than a screaming child, seeing that a grown man/woman should be responsible for their own behavior. Nothing is worse than a grown up arguing over a pointless and meaningless complaint like an annoyed child.
I rarely complain. I've heard too many horror stories. :(
I'm fairly picky about the food I eat, but not unreasonable by any means, I don't think. As for this article, well I've been on both sides of the equation and can safely say that some patrons are just pigs. Rude pigs that should stay home.
I worked as a bus-boy,and Saw how people complain first hand.
This is wat ya do:
1)Say: I want new FOOD NOW
2)Look the waiter in the face to make sure he knows you mean business
3)Get the new food and do NOT say thank you
4)Give 'em a dirty looks and eat
5)do NOT give a tip
We know a couple my husband and I refuse to go out to dinner with....
The wife always complains about what was on her plate, even though it's clearly listed on the menu. She also is someone who will eat most of her food, THEN complain to get a free meal. The husband always tries to get over by ordering 2-3 drinks using the most expensive Brandy he can find, then suggests we all split the bill down the middle!!! They are both college educated professionals that will make you snap if you ever went out to dinner with them, I now only meet them for drinks and never split checks with them.
My husband and I went to a restaurant for their Valentine's Day dinner. We waited forever to get our food while tables around us, who were seated after us, were getting their food. We politely asked the waiter to check on our food. It was a set menu so everyone in the restaurant was getting the same meal so it wasn't like we had a special order. When we got the meal, our chicken was somewhat raw on the inside. Since the meal had included both steak and chicken (along with salads, bread, and soup) we were getting full. We politely commented to the waiter that the chicken was not fully cooked and they offered to finish cooking it but we are already getting full. So, asked for a to go box so that we could take it home and we would have it later. Although we did not ask for any special treatment we were given a coupon for a meal at another time. So, eventually we went back. Lo and behold, we had a very similar experience. Although it was not on a night with a set menu, we sat and waited and waited for every course of the meal while other patrons were being served in a timely manner. This time we did not say anything, but we will not go back.
I never complain at a restaurant. I am generally easy going, but if I get bad service, bad food an unpleasant experience etc, I simply never go back.....ever. I've worked retail before and it is the same thing, someone complains and the manager hears blah blah, he gives a "deal" all for the purpose of getting the person to come back and spend more money. I just smile, pay my bill and tip and leave never to return. If management does not realize that their staff is walking around on their phone and ignoring their customers, their food sucks or there is garbage all over the floor. Me telling them isn't going to help anyway. Since they are not paying me to tell them how to improve, they can figure it out on their own.
The worst are the people who go to restaurants predisposed to finding some sort of minuscule fault with the server, food or drink so they can cheapskate the tip. These are greedy tools posing as people; they wake up each day figuring out a way to beat someone out of a buck. You've met them I'm sure.
I'll never forget the wonderful way a restaurant handled some problems for me and a friend one night: we ordered dinner and hadn't noticed the food was taking a long time to come out... the waiter came out and said, "I'm sorry, we're having an oven problem in the kitchen and I know your food is late, we will make those glasses of wine complimentary." We were delighted! We hadn't even complained~! Things went on, then the waiter came out again and said, "I'm sorry, we're still working on the problem, we'd like to make the dinners complimentary and a free dessert." Again, we hadn't complained (but we were really wolfing down those rolls at that point). A few minutes later, after the food arrived, the manager or owner came out and said, "In addition to a complimentary dinner, we are giving you each a $20 coupon off your next meal here." Altho we had never complained, they went to great lengths to make sure that our experience there would be positive, I will always remember that as the classiest behavior in a restaurant ever. Ever chance I get to tell my friends about this restaurant and why I like it so much, I do.
Probably one of the most insensitive articles I have read on here, obviously the "man in his 40s" has some kind of OCD or similar condition and for the writer to call him a bed wetter is just slanderous, I'm waiting for a followup article about how the same author had to deal with a "gimp" because they complained there wasn't enough room for their wheelchair at the table.
M: I want to complain.
C: You want to complain! Look at these shoes. I've only had them three weeks and the heels are worn right through.
M: No, I want to complain about...
C: If you complain nothing happens, you might as well not bother.
M: Oh!
C: Oh my back hurts, it's not a very fine day and I'm sick and tired of this office.
from monty python's argument clinic
Our server was cleaning the table which was across the aisle from our table. She was carrying the stack of 5 or 6 plates
and then one of her co-workers called her. She put the stack of dirty plates on our table and went to whomever called her.
I left a 2 cent tip.
What's sad is that she probably thought you were rude and cheap, not getting your point at all. I understand your frustration, but I would have clearly asked her to remove them or ask for a manager; that way she would now know what NOT to do.
SHE should have tipped YOU! That's appalling what she did. She must not have been very bright...at all.
The "humor" in this article, and a complaint is not funny, was excessive and it made the article to be incoherent, at least to me.
If the comedic lines were removed, then this article would be understandable and to the points.
I had a hard time trying to comprehend this article, but I think I understood some of the points the author was trying to make.
My comment appears to be as if I am complaining....LOL.
I can't believe I wasted 3 minutes reading this... Seriously? We need articles teaching us how to complain now?
The last time was because the food was cold I do not like cold eggs.I pay for hot food and that is the way it should be hot.. A new plait of food was sent out and it was hot so i left a good tip because she took of the problem with a smile. i just told her the eggs are cold in a nice way as she did not it,
Seriously, you can't spell plate?
You really need to spell check before you hit send. It makes it really hard to know what you are talking about with so many spelling errors. Maybe that's why you have problems in restaurants. You don't communicate very well. Cold eggs. Oh my. Send them back.
Once got a chicken breast that was nearly raw inside and asked if it could please be fully cooked and it was done; whether or not they were furious and spat on it is something I will never know but I had a real problem and asked politely. But having waited tables myself, I will complain about food if I simply don't like it because I ordered it. Getting nasty makes some people feel important but trust me when I tell you it only makes you look like a 4-alarm jerk and an ill-bred loser.
Unfortunately, the noise level in many restaurants – including some fairly high-end ones – have caused us to severely limit our dining-out excursions. When one can't even hold a conversation without shouting, something's wrong. Very little sympathy is ever offered by those running the establishments.
As far as noisy kids are concerned, when we go out, if there are well-behaved kids in a booth or at a table nearby, we comment favorably, to the parents, so that the children can hear that we are pleased. The parents are pleased to hear that Jenny/Jonny has been so good as to draw that attention. The kids, too, are often surprised and pleased, and will likely want to repeat that. A win-win.
I generally don't complain about food service; but I have a friend that is rarely satisfied with her meal. Unfortunately for us, a dinner out is usually uncomfortable because she likes steak, great steak (filet minon) well done. Yes, its a complete waste of great meat. What generally happens is one of us gets her well done steak, but before we can switch with her, so the mid rare steak isn't wasted, she's sent ours back for more cooking. Since we know we have the shoelace she ordered, we don't complain. We suffer through it.
I think I would stop going to dinner with her.
Ditto! I try hard not to be a food snob (or snob of any kind), but it drives me CRAZY when my mother in law orders steak (the only thing she eats) WELL DONE....and then complains about it being dry!!!!!!
Well-done does NOT mean dry. Just because someone orders their steak well-done (which is completely their prerogative, it's THEIR food and they can have it however THEY want it) doesn't mean that the kitchen shouldn't know how not to overcook it. They're COOKS. It's what they DO.
Speaking as an ex-server, I will complain if it is something that can easily be corrected; i.e., steak or burger at totally wrong temp., not hot enough or something forgotten. DO NOT blame the server for mistakes in kitchen. Be nice and maybe problem wil be easily and calmly fixed.
"Be nice and MAYBE the(sic) problem wil be easily and calmly fixed"? MAYBE is the word that's a problem. 'Being nice wouldn't work in a place like your restaurantt. 'Maybe the problem will be fixed' is not a word that is encountered in good establishments when issues arise and are pointed out by the customer in a respectful fashion 'Maybe' the problem easily and calmly fixed is the customer's worry, because then they are at the mercy of servers and cooks (and managers) who don't really care much about the customer's dining experience, and will not try to rectify the issue courteously and expeditiously. I think that every customer has had this happen. Then you begin to worry about what is happening in the back for revenge. Maybe the best solution is to be nice, ask the manager to cancel the meal and then go somewhere else, not to resturn. And maybe not leave a tip for having been treated disrespectfully..
I think you might be projecting.
I don't blame the server for problems in the kitchen, with the proviso that the problems are invisible (meat cooked to wrong temp, etc.) If I say "no tomatoes please," and I get a sandwich, salad or plate with a tonne of visible tomato on it, then I am without a doubt going to squarely blame the server. Because even if they put the ticket in correctly and the kitchen cannot read, I expect the server to run their eye over the plate, turn back to the kitchen and say "this was no tomato, please remake it." And if it comes to me with visible tomato juice and seeds, I'm going to be furious at both the server and the kitchen for just picking it off the plate.
If the kitchen makes a visible error (puts corn on a plate that was supposed to have broccoli,) it is absolutely the duty of the server not to bring it out. And if they do because they're not paying attention to their orders, I'm going to be polite, but I'm not going to be happy. And I'm going to blame the server. And it doesn't matter whether they did or did not put the order in correctly.
The way to order around here is "Just bring me what you want me to have because you never give me what I order". And the waiters serving the food never checks to see if what he is serving is correct.
I think, done correctly, communicating dissatisfaction with one's dining experience in a subtle and respectful manner is a courtesy to a restaurant. Most restaurant owners that I know want to hear when there's a problem. It's too late to fix when it ends up on Yelp and potential customers are lost.
I take my complaining to YELP!
Coward.
It's not fair to be too afraid to speak up and then post the problem on Yelp. They cannot fix the problem unless they know about it. Things happen. A good server and business WANTS to know when you are not satisfied so they can fix it. And yes – I have been a server, bartender and worked in customer service over the years. It's not always easy, but it's very rewarding when you can make people happy, even the difficult ones.
In my opinion it is not my job to tell them their failings. I am their customer, I am going to their establishment to purchase their product. If their product is substandard, they should figure that out.
Question: You send your child to school every day and he/she is misbehaving, acting out, not turning in homework and not participating in class. He or she is failing. Wouldn't you expect your child's teacher/school to contact you about what is going on? Or is it your job to "figure it out"? People need to work together to solve problems. A restaurant owner/manager cannot be everywhere 100% of the time and might just miss out on things employees are doing that negatively impact the restaurant/customer experience. By the time they "figure it out", they've lost customers and revenue.
I usually leave the mess uneaten, pay (without tipping) and start with Yelp.com and other review sites across the web for one-star scathing reviews (short and sweet, stating facts only). If the place is a health hazard, I will also alert the Health Dept. and news media.
Sounds like you're wasting your money AND miserable. Yes, I use and make internet reviews on Yelp, etc. BUT, I will never leave a restaurant unsatisfied while paying in full, and will not stiff the waiter if the food is bad...it's the chef's part. I rarely have bad experiences, love eating at "Hole in the Wall's" as well as Five Star restaurants, but if you're honest and polite, you'll rarely have a bad experience.
After spending 20+ years in the restaurant business, in every position, I can guarantee you that if you have a bad experience, speak up, but speak up in a civil manner. Problems will get fixed to everyone's satisfaction. (However, there is a percentage of the population that will never be satisfied. They are not the norm.)
If you spend your time at fast food joints, or corporate chains, please understand that you are getting what you pay for- not much. The food is pre-packaged, microwaved, and preserved to the hilt. The workers are underpaid, under trained, and not entirely cognizant of things like hospitality or sanitary practices. Chains churn through workers on a weekly (sometimes daily) basis, and you would be better off taking your business to a locally owned business where the owner and staff are invested in quality food.
Chefs and waitstaff in respectable establishments do not spit in your food, nor do they drop it on the ground as punishment for complaining. I find that the main point of contention usually comes from differing levels of information. Your idea of medium rare might be different than the chef's.
A quality establishment will communicate the dish and its ingredients to you through the menu and the waitstaff. If you have questions, don't hesitate to ask. Some diners are intimidated by unfamiliar ingredients and technique, and remain quiet out of embarrassment or a fear of being judged.. It is far better to ask before you receive something you don't like, and you will find that the waitstaff agree with you.
If you have a serious allergy or food restriction, contact the place before you dine (if it is a catered event, let the host know when you RSVP). Trust me, the staff doesn't want any diner going into anaphylactic shock. It's bad for business. Don't put anything in your mouth unless you know what is in it. If you are clear about your allergies before you order, then your dinning experience will be fine. If the waitstaff and chef can't tell you what is in the food, you're eating in the wrong place.
Finally, please understand that there is a difference between disliking a food and being allergic. I urge anyone attending a catered event to let the host know about their allergies/food restrictions when they RSVP. Many guests arrive at parties with special requests, not realizing that most catered events have the food prepared off site prior to the event. The chef working in a back hall in a museum didn't pack the extra food 'just in case.' You would be surprised at the number of people who claim to have a food allergy, and when informed that their menu choice is incompatible with their allergy, are miraculously cured. Gluten, dairy, and onion/garlic allergies are the most common miraculous cures. If you eat it, and don't get ill, you are not allergic. That is an intolerance: you might burp or have a bit of gas, but if you didn't let the host know when you RSVP'd, then it is your fault.
I've eaten in many unique places throughout the U.S. and abroad, and have done so with a healthy appetite and sense of adventure. I've never suffered from food poisoning, and rarely have I had a bad experience with waitstaff. Have some standards- stay away from chains and anything restaurant that has Family in the title, and be open to new culinary experiences, and you will be rewarded.
Attention anyone taking orders.... WRITE THEM DOWN. Don't try to memorize a table full of orders because 95% of the time you will F*** it up!
My biggest pet peeve with restaurants is when management seems to think it's cute or kitschy or "shows expertise or fancy skills," to NOT let their staff write things down. I hate it. And when I'm leaving I do politely tell them this in the hopes that enough people will tell them that this "trick show" is annoying and leads to far more complaints and problems than if they'd just written it down. And I don't go back. Because seriously, I have more problems with getting what I asked for when they don't get to write it down. And it is totally NOT the server's fault at all. Management thinks it's adorable or something. I can't believe that servers like it one bit.
I hate complaining... so I have to really work up the courage to do so. I'm really nice and honest about my complaints though, so hopefully the server appreciates that.
Americans are so undignified that their media even has to tell them how to complain. Like little children. Of course, this would NEVER happen in the more refined and sophisticated Europe, the home to manners and sophistication.
It's just not an Eatocracy article without a troll from Jeann.
LOL Europe, the refined land of good manners and sophistication? You are a funny woman talking about Europe's superior sophistication while calling a whole country little children. Definitely very refined manners.
Refined? Some of the rudest people I know are European. Refined and sophisticated people don't look down their noses at others.
This article was clearly written by a European-and it was a bitchy, snippy, and snotty. So I cant agree with you there.
Key word = nappy
You're just being sarcastic, right? If not, the worst service from the rudest server ever, was in Paris. Not in a tourist area, but just very crappy service. The food was delicious, the restaurant delightful and a surly, nasty waiter almost ruined the evening out with Parisan friends. They were not amused, to say the least!
Complaining only works if you can get one of the staff to listen to you. I went to a place that messed up my order so I tried to complain. I got passed by three members of the staff that wouldn't even look at me. The one who brought my check pretended to not speak English (I heard him talking to someone else in English earlier). I finally got to see the store manager who didn't seem to care and just offered a $5 gift certificate for next time. As if there was going to BE a next time.
My family and I had an interesting experience at a restaurant we stopped at on a family outing. We had a first-timer waiter, and my wife paid that day. He came up and got our drink orders, returning with the drinks for all five of us, he got one drink off the tray, and the rest became unbalanced and fell...right into my wife's lap. The waiter tossed us a few napkins and ran off to get more drinks...this time they landed on the table somewhat in order. The food came up nice and hot...then after our meal, we ordered some shakes (a specialty at this particular place). The same waiter carried out the shakes...took off the first one, and...you guessed it...the rest fell in my wife's lap...again. The waiter then left the table to re-do the other 4 shakes, and left the mess of all the sodas, tea, and shakes on and under our table, and of course, my wife's jeans she wore for the day were drenched and hardening from all the sugar, etc.
That is one of the first times I ever had to complain to a manager about a waiter. He had the guy go over with a mop, which he swished around a few times and left, leaving a bigger mess than he started with.
We went to pay and get the heck outta there before he came back with something messier, and at the cashier, the manager took our ticket and said we didn't have to pay. I was grateful for that, but have never stepped foot in there again.
Have a little pity on those with food allergies and sometimes cannot eat what is on their plate. People who send food back are not always egotistical and full of themselves.
That's a great point. My wife has a few food allergies. If something she's allergic to is on the plate, she can't just "eat around it". The bits/juices/oils/etc mix with other items in the dish and can be enough to cause at least a mild reaction.
It's unacceptable to her when she sends a plate back, with an explanation of her allergies, and the server or cook simply picks the offending bits off the plate and sends it back to the table. This happens about 1/3 of the time. We always know when it happens; when the "new" dinner comes out 2 minutes later, it's clearly been recycled, not prepared anew. In fact, we often sees bits of the offending item still on the plate. Why do servers and cooks even attempt this ruse? It only forces us to escalate the complaint.
One of the few times I complained was at the Waldorf-Astoria in NYC. My sister had taken us for a champagne brunch after our wedding. They'd been closed for renovations for a couple of months and had just re-opened.
Well, I didn't exactly complain. First, there was a lovely little pink thingie floating in my champagne. Heck, I thought it was a flower petal or something. When I asked the waiter what it was, he looked horrified and took it away. Only then did I realize it was a dirty glass!! (He comped all our champagne.)
A little while later, a HUGE bug started flying around the room. Remember, they'd been shut down for a while. It looked like a cockroach but was about 3-4 inches long. It zoomed around several tables, then landed on ours!
Free brunch!
Heck, it was delicious, fancy, and made for a great story, too. I had no complaints.
I'm not a hard person to please. Very rarely have I sent food back, and every time the waiter/waitress has always been prompt with the replacement.
It's amazing how far being polite will get you.
It really is amazing how screamers think things will get better the louder they scream. I'm with you, being polite gets you so much further.
I complain when things are not to my satisfaction – but that isn't very often. Waiters/waitresses and restaurants in general want you to be happy, since happy customers come back – so they typically get it right the first time. So I have complained more than "once or twice" – but certainly not enough to be considered frequently.
If I am paying for a meal, I have the right to have it the way I ordered it. If I order a rare steak, or a plate without tomatoes, then I that is what I want. But I do not have the right to take it out on my server. Unless it is a visible mistake – I ordered a hamburger and they give me tuna sandwich – the server has no way of knowing something is wrong until I tell him. Mistakes do happen, and I don't freak out when they do – but I also expect them to be corrected. And never dock a server's tip because of a food error they could do nothing to prevent.
Well don't you sound like a lovely person. Are we a little full of ourselves?
Actually she sounds perfectly reasonable.
I worked one summer in the kitchen of a private club.One evening ,a customer sent a steak back to the kitchen.The cook grabbed the steak, threw it on the floor and stepped on it.He put it on the grill for a few more minutes and returned it.Never send food back to the kitchen.
Good advice. I've heard the same thing from others who had worked in the food-service industry before.
When he was a teenager, my brother-in-law worked in kitchen of a place in the country fair. To this day (he's almost 60) he won't eat coleslaw...
I know how to cook, I stay home and put my money in the bank. Restaurants are dirty vile filthy places where old ingredients are sold at a premium. I buy fresh ingredients to make all of my meals @ home in my large kitchen that is equipped with all of the best appliances. People who dine out are rubes just asking to get taken by unscrupulous hacks. The only time I would go to a restaurant is if my gas or electricity were out and I did not feel like grilling outdoors.
Yeah, I'll just bet with all your fancy kitchen stuff you put out a great meal. Are there not times though when you just don't feel like cooking? My hubby and I treat ourselves out to eat a couple times (3) a month. We have learned where to go and where not to go. We usually get great service and not too many problems with the food. We also tip well and make sure that management knows when things are great. Its good to complain when things are wrong, but its great to comment to a manager when things go really well too!
Some folks mentioned tipping the server well for good service. Just to let you know, when you order a pizza delivery, you should tip your delivery guy a reasonable amount. I thought that the delivery charge went to the driver to pay for their gas, but when my son started delivering found out that that is not true. Drivers get very little gas money. Also, if you can't afford to give a couple bucks to a driver that brings your pizza in the stated time they give you, DONT ORDER OR GO PICK IT UP! Stiffing a driver or just giving a dollar shows how little class you have or how stupid you are. Many people deliver food because they need extra money to feed their own families. Its not a career path in todays job market. My son and his fellow drivers have talked about how many people now don't even tip at all anymore. Thats how these guys/gals earn their money, from tips cause they make much less than servers in restaraunts.
I eat in resturants when I travel. Once or twice a month, I also eat out instead of cooking when I get home from work. It is just nice to get away once in while. Somehow I just cannot picture anyone who never travels, or takes a day trip.
There are just some things that are better eaten out. You may not mind having your house smell like old fried food, but I prefer to have the occasional fried chicken pr fish cooked in someone else's place. Similarly, the best pizza crust takes a temperature I'd rather not try to achieve in my own oven, and a pizza stone goes only so far to approximate the crust a pizzeria can make. Stir fries at home are never as good as those made in seasoned woks over industrial-strength gas burners. Prime beef is generally not available to the home cook at all. I'll take the risk and eat out to get these foods.
I do not consider myself overly critical.
If I order a steak medium rare and it comes out rare or medium, I eat it. I understand that sometimes it's a matter of interpretation.
My wife, on the other hand, is completely paranoid when it comes to complaining about food or service. She is thoroughly convinced that ANY complaint, no matter how justified, will result in either the cook spitting in the food or "floor seasoning."
Example: She and and I were in a restaurant waiting area. The restaurant had plenty of visibly empty tables. There were no hosts/hostesses in sight to seat us.
After a couple minutes of waiting, I said in a clearly audible, but not overly loud tone, "Is anybody working here?" By the way my wife's face blanched, you would have thought I yelled, "RAT!"
BTW – A hostess promptly appeared, apologized for her oversight, seated us at a great table, and comped our appetizers. Sometimes it does pay to complain.
Why isn't there enough sauce on a spaghetti dinner ? I have always had to request to take my dinner back to add more sauce.
By the way, it is true that the chef / cook will spit into your dinner if he / she fells that they were insulted when a dinner is returned?
You're like the driver who complains that everybody is driving too slow. Perhaps you're driving too fast.
Simply request extra sauce on your spaghetti when you order. It's relatively cheap for the restaurant.
They base they portions on the average patron's taste. There is no crime in liking more sauce than the average patron. You just need to recognize this fact and realize that they aren't mind readers.
Dave's not here...
Neither is the extra sauce..
In my experience working at restaurants, the cooks never spit in the food or anything like that. I think that if it ever happens it may be at a fast food place or somewhere that the staff are of much lower quality and poorly supervised.
On the very rare occations that I order a pasta dish, they always put too much sauce on my plate. At home I use only 1/3 of what everyone else does. The amount of sauce is by taste. I actually like the taste of pasta, and do not like to mask it. Your may really like the taste of the sauce, and that is fine. But do not assume that the amount of saucet that you like is the standard. Just ask for more.
It usually isn't true that cooks will spit in your food. It is a felony to contaminate food and no respectable chef is going to risk their freedom and civil rights on something so petty. Most news reports about that happening are in the fast food industry and the employees who do that do get caught, fired and that is just the start of the chain of consequences for them. As to the issue of too little gravy/sauce on pasta... Not all Italian dishes are served swimming in gravy. In fact most aren't. http://www.delallo.com/articles/sauce-and-serve-pasta notes that "In authentic Italian cuisine, the pasta sauce is always incorporated into the pasta before serving. And furthermore, the amount of sauce used is just enough to coat the pasta." So my feeling is, if that Italian restaurant you're going to advertises "authentic" or "authentic style..." then you may want to reconsider and choose a different restaurant.
The cook or chef spitting into your plate would not only get him/her fired, but could also be grounds for criminal action. I have NEVER seen that happen, and I have worked (during young out of high school years) for about 10 years in that business.
'runy' is right: proper Italian spaghetti is not drowning in sauce; if you don't like it I suggest maybe you order something else.
As a restaurant owner, I can promise you that I want to make every effort to make your experience in my restaurant a pleasant one. If something is not to your liking or incorrect, please let your server know! We aren't mind readers, and can't correct the issue if we aren't informed of it! I hate to think anyone would leave my restaurarant unhappy, so let us know in that moment- don't just take to Yelp and rip us a part without giving us a shot to resolve the problem. Also, realize that no mistake is made on purpose. If someone on the staff is rude or dismissive, that is one thing, but if you requested no tomato and one winded up on your plate, I'll fix it happily. But please don't act like I was trying to feed you rat poison. When you become confrontational and abusive at the get go I probably just want to avoid you and get you out as quick as possible. Both servers and patrons would do well to remember that you attract more bees with honey than vinegar.
Mary, thanks for your post. I am often reluctant to complain. We go to a few restaurants frequently. These are fairly high end places and the few (literally maybe two times) that I said something about the food that was disagreeable to me – they insisted on taking it off the bill. That was never my intent. These disappointing events weren't intentional and they didn't kill me. So, please, if you ever offer to comp someone because they complained, please respect their request not to if they make that request. For me – I'm just lest likely to say anything if I think the restaurant is going to insist on comping me.
less not lest! Jeez, so much for my proof reading! :)
Dkm – Here is a friendly suggestion. If you get comped and feel you don't deserve it, just take the money you saved and give it to your favorite charity that way everybody wins – the resturant feels they made you happy, you were heard, and a child got the medication she needed. Sounds like a win/win/win.
AMEN
The few times I have complained it has been when I have ordered something medium rare and ended up with well-done (dry). That's pretty much it, unless it just tastes bad or awful. Of course, there was one time I had some chicken that tasted funky, didn't say anything and ended up with food poisoning, ugh.
I have a friend who used to wait in a high end restaurant.
He told me that many times the chefs actually appreciate re-cook requests since it helps them hone their skills.
They would rather re-cook and get it right, than have customers spread the word that their cuisine is not up to par and lose future customers.
It s good idea to complain of course in a civil way I have a bad experince in this restaurant ,got home write a e mail to the manager and later I received a response full of excuses and a set of coupons ,never used never back there but is least the manager listen and know what was going on in his restaurant, and maybe maybe hopefull fix the problem we call that a positive feedback .
This is a complaint against parents that bring their screaming kids into a restaurant and then just let them continue screaming with no consideration of those around. This recently happened to my husband and I at a local restaurant. We were seated next to a family of five, a mom and dad and three young children. The kids were not unhappy just screaming and playing while they waited for their food. We couldn't even have a simple conversation it was so loud. We asked to be moved to the other side of the restaurant and the waitress said "I knew you were going to ask to be moved, I heard them screaming" The paraent just sat their on their phones and ignoring the chaos the kids were causing. And please don't anyone say that the screaming kids is "just how they are" When I was a kid it simply was not tolerated. Period. I am fifty and back when I was a kid parents had control of their kids and were respectful of others around. Now days we are all expected to just endure what ever the out of control kids dish out. And today I was getting a haircut at the salon and some lady had her two kids in there about 4-5 years old they were running at full speed around the salon screaming and playing, I couldn't even hear my hairdresser to discuss the hair cut. Finally the hairdresser said something to the kids about not running through the salon and they acted like they were really being punished for something. Again, we would have never even thought to go running through someone's business place like it was our own home to do what ever we liked when we were kids. Times have changed.
Amen Sister...I am totally with you.
I've got some extra special sauce for all you complainers.
You should get what you pay for. If you pay for a steak, then you should get it how you ordered it. If it came incorrectly cooked, or if there is a bug on your entree, then sending it back for a decent reason like that is ok. Letting the wait staff know promptly, quietly, and politely guarantees a good response all the way around. But if you're unhappy because you didn't read the menu or your peas are touching your potatoes, then that is your fault. The time of "the customer is always right" is long gone, people.
The worst I ever saw was a a place called the "Chicken Inn" in Wisconsin (no longer there) – a typical diner place. After being seated, we pretty much saw a fistfight between the waitresses and lots of curse words-a-flyin' about who was the worst waitress ever and how the place sucked and neither one wanted to work there. Needless to say, we just left. It was torn down ages ago...but that still stuck in my head.
I am a good cook so I know how "what I've ordered" should be cooked, ect... I rarely complain unless the meal presented to me, isn't as I have ordered. for instance, I like my steaks bloody, so if they arive well done, there is a problem that needs to be fixed and yes I'll wait. and on occasion, a substitution has been made on my order without my consent (greek restarant, order came with a side of roasted potatoes that I love and the chef thought rice would be nicer. we had words. i got my potatoes. the waitress got a nice tip. the chef, pissed, made someone cross out potatoes on all the menus and write in "rice". I made a point of asking for a side of potatoes, every time I came in ever after. the chef no longer works there).
i ordered calamari at a place I like and from a person I know that worked there. As the world "calamari' left my lips, a waiter brought a plate of it that was cold and sitting around.. , I sent it right back as the server couldn't believe it came out of the kitchen so quickly. When they brought a fresh plate, I'd lost my appetite and I couldn't eat it. They didn't charge me...
It is nice to know that massive self entitlement insanity isnt just an American thing. It appears that people suck worldwide and that makes me quite happy.
Manuel, are you being a wise ass about the handwritten letter? I dine out a great deal and am generally very easy going but I do feel that there are times when issues need to be brought to the attention of someone above the level of a shift manager. It is vindicating to see you admit that some staff begin their cover story the moment a guest asks to speak with a member of management. It is almost as if there is no recourse for the person whom is dining out any longer. It is frustrating.
I am gluten free. Before I go out to eat at a restaurant I've never been before I look online to see if there is a gluten free menu, and I call ahead to alert the restaurant of my food allergy. If there is a GF menu online I always have my order ready to give. It's much easier.
I used to be barista and I currently work in customer service so I understand how hard it can be at times and the importance of tips. I always tip well, leave little notes about what I liked and thank them for having GF options. If things don't go as planned, service isn't great, or there is gluten in food I try to be as nice as possible and speak with our waiter who usually gets a manager. And issues get resolved peacefully. Some restaurants offer surveys. I always fill those out praising where I can. Sometimes when you will them out you'll get a disount on your next meal!
If I were GF, I'd never eat out.
Celiac's disease, gluten sensitivity, or just into fads?
My worst experience was at a diner that has been patronized by generations of local folk for at least 5 decades. Despite this eatery having failed health inspections on several occasions my wife and I would begrudgingly join her family for lunch on Sundays. The *last* time we went I found a pube in the bottom of my coffee cup. My inlaws still have lunch there every Sunday.
I used to cook at a steakhouse in my younger days, and one night a very nice and polite waitress was upset that her customer returned his perfectly cooked steak. She indicated that he does this all the time. So I took his steak, flipped it over onto a new plate with a new garnish, and gave it back. She was skeptical, but I assured her that if he does it all the time it has nothing to do with the steak. She excitedly reported back to me that he loved his "new" steak.
One of my worst restaurant experiences was at a popular, always-busy lunch spot downtown that my co-workers and I would go to on a fairly regular basis. They served pasta, burgers, sandwiches, etc. and you would line up, place your order at the counter and wait until they called your number for pickup. The order/pickup counter was long and open with an almost full view of the kitchen area. I chose the 5-cheese lasagna that day and, while my co-workers and I were waiting, was horrified to see one of the kitchen guys pop my plate of lasagna in the microwave, take it out and then stick his bare hand into it to check how warm it was. I and my co-workers spoke up and the managers/owners said they'd speak with the guy, but they didn't offer to refund my money. All they did was offer to let me order something different off the menu. Have never eaten there again. :-/
Someone needs to get some. Holy crap. Talk about Debbie Downer
He, him, his
Count em, folks. Read between the lines..
When ordering a baked potato I hate it when they bring out a microwaved one. Its obviously not baked, not as fluffy and I didn't order a microwaved potato. The waiter says they are baked up or busy and it would take too long...
I see your point and completely agree with you if it says baked potato, it should be baked, not microwaved, however this has nothing to do with the server. Kitchen managers and the cooks are the ones that decide anything about the food and how it is made.
Most everything from TGI Fridays, Chili's, Appleby's etc., etc. is from the microwave.
I can give an explanation for the baked/microwaved spuds.
It takes about 45 minutes for a potato to bake in the ovens in a restaurant. Usually, one or two pans full (about 50 potatoes) are coming out every 15 minutes. If the restaurant is coming up on a busy time, they will double it up, or whatever they feel is needed. Sometimes, there are rushes that happen at odd times, or between cycles, and the kitchen staff will take the potatoes out of the oven early and nuke them the rest of the way as opposed to making the customer's wait 15 minutes longer for the spud to be done. It is a common practice.
Is it true that if you send your food back, somebody in the kitchen spits on it or sneezes on it or does something even more gross before they send it back to you?
No.
That is exactly why I never complain about my food at a restaurant. I have no idea what the chef and waiter/waitress might do to my food.
I've worked in a number of restaurants and have never seen or heard of any cooks ever doing anything to anyones food that they sent back. People aren't as cruel and mean as you might think they are.
I heard the Chef puts some special sauce on your food...Yum-Yum
This goes back to the "how" of complaining. If you treat your server with respect (and by extension, the kitchen staff), then you're going to get good results. If you throw a tantrum in the restaurant, then you've created a "me against them" scenario, and who knows what will go into your food. Lots of servers (and all the ones that I know personally) have better ethics than that and would never mess with your food, but we're talking about a huge industry, and just like any other walk of life, I'm sure there are wait staff and kitchen staff who are a-holes that would spit in your food. Just don't give them a reason to.
Yeah, Food tampering is a felony and can land you in jail. Go ahead, "Mess" with it... sooner or later you will be cooking prison food w/ that attitude and your establishment will have a hefty civil penalty leveraged against it.
I complain when things are way wrong...and I praise when things are great, both to the waiter, manager, and/or che. If done properly (either way it goes) and you go back, you will be remembered. The bottom line, however, is some people go out of their way to make you life difficult and those are the people who you politely dis-invite to come back.
I remember once complaining about having gotten a piece of plastic in my good. This is the only time I have ever complained in a restaurant, and rightfully so... The waitress, very horrified, immediately took away my plate and came back with a totally new plate of food even though I had eaten most of the first one before I discovered it. This totally surprised me and I would say is coming close to the definition of excellent service
While I like this column, let's keep the gender stereotyping to a minimum.
"This incident saddened me somewhat. Men – they used to be more, you know, manly."
How about this guy is not the definition of all men? How about him saying "yuck" is not emasculating? Men are reduced to soulless, stoic creatures already. Don't contribute to anymore of it.
Your comment isn't very, you know, manly.
wh..aaat?
you just made outrage stupid.
Thats because the waiter is waiting for some manly man to come along an sweep him off his feet and take him to the YMCA
Stereotype much? So the way to really put someone down is to imply they're gay, right? And everyone knows that waiters are all gay, like hairdressers and decorators. Homophobe.
So you are saying all male hairdressers and decorators are gay? Interesting!!!!
Wait staff who want to make money work hard. I reflect my opinion about their work with the tip amount. A small tip is a loud complaint. I prefer to point out the best. If I feel my wait staff person has done a great job they get a great tip and a request to speak to the manager. I want the staff person to hear what they've done that is worth acknowledgement in front of their manager. I want the manager to know that their staff member is appreciated and the staff member to know that their manager is aware of their efforts. (It comes in handy when the topic of hours or pay is negotiated in the future.) I have found that, when I've returned to these same restaurants, I am remembered and treated well because word gets around.
I'm not tipping for the food, I'm tipping for the service. The waitstaff has no control whatsoever over the food. We are *very* generous tippers if the service is deserving of it.
It depends on the restaurant and my expectations if I'm at a high end restaurant, I demand high end service. I'm paying more all around for that high end meal and it should be perfect. If I don't want a tomato on my plate, then I'm paying enough to not have a tomato on my plate. Usually I get a great experience without a hitch. The last time I went to a steakhouse with my wife, we had the worst service possible which was a shame because the food was perfect. Our bill for the two of us was $200. The waiter never checked on us, our glasses went empty, and the food sat in front of us for 15 minutes after we were done eating before a busboy came to pick it up. To top it off, it was my wife's birthday, I called ahead with the reservation to make sure they knew this and to bring out a cake. Two tables by us had birthdays at them also and had cakes brought out. She didn't even get a happy birthday from any of the staff. This is usually our go to place. It was the first time I had ever left less than a 15% tip. My scale usually starts at 25% and then gets knocked down based on service. Most servers get at least 20%. It was the first time I had called a restaurant after my visit to complain about the service. The manager appreciated it and just asked us to let him know the next time we went there so that he could roll out the red carpet. I told the manager thanks and ended the conversation. I'm not one to ask for free stuff, but on a visit that was that horrendous, he should have invited us back on him. I probably will never go back to take him up on his offer which is a shame because I used to go there for all of our special occasions.
Why didn't you say anything in the moment?
I don't complain mainly because I fear they will wind up spitting on my food.
Lemming!
Yes it probably won't happen, but spitting in peoples food has happened before. If that is a persons fear, we have no right to judge.
Unless the order was improperly transposed, the wait staff is at the mercy of the kitchen group. A firm believer in not tipping, unless required, I usually look for fault in every aspect of the dining experience and use it against the restaurant to not tip. I don't care what others think. I have been chased down the street for not tipping, and have had the manager come over to me instructing how they work for tips, to which I tell restaurant people. " I am a patron of the restaurant, not their employer, if you think they are worth more $$, then you pay them!"
What a sorry sack. To go in looking for a reason not to tip is NOT the reason to dine out! You should be looking for an enjoyable experience. Stay at home and NEVER, EVER enter the industry AGAIN! You are hereby blacklisted! p.s.( I strongly suggest you buy a can opener)
Dave, if you want the restaurant to pay them more in lieu of you tipping, you're just going to end up paying more for your food. Its going to cost you either way, so just leave an appropriate tip.
Servers who are paid a flat rate have no incentive to give above and beyond service. Servers who expects a crappy tip from a crappy repeat customer will give crappy service.
If you were paid a flat rate, it would presumable be higher than the current minimum or less. In which case your incentive for doing a good job is keeping said job.
If you don't like the system, don't buy the product. The tip is the cost of table-service. If you don't like tipping, there are plenty of other ways to obtain food which do not require tipping, but you have to take it from the counter to your table all by yourself.
It has been said that if a woman wants to see how her husband will treat her in ten years, she should observe how he treats the waitstaff at a restaurant. Please... tell me you're single, and promise to stay that way.
Dave's not here...
Win
Uuugggg I so dislike people like you. Sure we can pay our servers a higher hourly rate, but guess what?? Your $8.800 burger just jumped to $13.00.
We don't want you in our restaurant anyway.....
Ah so you're "that guy" that everyone hates.
Stay home and feed yourself! Nobody needs to be around your negativity.
I'm going to guess that, more often than not, you eat out alone. I've had family members act like that. I may love them, but I certaintly don't like them.
How I complain in a restaurant: If it's the food, I send it back. If it's the service, I leave a big tip (as I always do) and never enter the establishment again.
If you don't complain to the manager or owner they won't have the opportunity to fix the problem. If you owned the restaurant you'd want to know that there was a problem.
It's not the customers job to perfect a business, it's the owners.
I ordered a burger one time and the waitress brought it out on a plate which was cupped in her hand and her thumb was on top of the burger bun. I asked why she was carrying it that way with her thumb on top of the burger and she actually said "so I don't drop it on the floor again!"
That's the last time I ate a burger there but the fries are still good.
"so I don't drop it on the floor again!" Whoa! Do you mean she dropped it once already on the way out to you?
Yes. This was actually a reader submitted story sent into Reader's Digest a few years ago.
Once a group of us decided to try out a new restaurant in my neighborhood. We made a reservation for five. Four of us arrived at once. The fifth person was stuck in traffic, driving from a job 30 miles away. So we decided to get some drinks and appetizers until she got there. About 20 minutes after the drinks and appetizers came, the owner came to our table and began loudly berating us for making a reservation for more people than showed up. We tried to explain the situation but she kept ranting. A few minutes later the fifth member of our party arrived. We decided to pay for what we'd already consumed and get dinner elsewhere. As we left we told the owner that we would tell everyone we worked with or knew about how we were treated. I lived in the neighborhood and two other members of our party worked in the neighborhood. Within three months the restaurant was gone. I hope we had something to do with that. I should note that it was a Friday night when we were there and the place was half empty.
you f**ktard waiters should do a better job
As a former Restaurant Manager for 15 years, and one who later owned multiple, customer service businesses, I would like to offer the flip side of this column.
First, let me state that I rarely complain in a restaurant, as I can tell the difference between, for example, a dinner served late because the place is in the weeds with business vs a dinner served late because someone screwed up or just doesn't care.
That being said, if I ask to speak to a Manager, I have a good reason in so doing and it is in your best interest as a server to get a Manager immediately. I do NOT expect to wait more than a minute or two for said Manager to approach my table. I will state my case calmly, eloquently, totally, and then I will tell you what I expect. That expectation is not the sun and the stars, but a reasonable "fix-it" that will make me a happy camper. Now, comes the most important part.....the part that will tell me whether or not you are a good manager or merely one of the guys dressed better than everyone else (well, at least, usually) in the restaurant. If the first thing out of your mouth is an excuse, then you are going to have a major problem with me. I didn't ask to speak to you to hear excuses, I want to hear solutions. I don't care that your cook went home sick, that your server was brand new (shame on you for not training him/her better before putting them in front of your most valuable commodity, your guests) or that you dog died. I DON'T CARE. I want an apology, then I want my problem rectified and I want to hear what you are going to do to make me happy. By then, I have already have given you some major hints. Either take my hints and keep a customer or lose one. And remember, an unhappy guest who's problem is not satisfied will tell 60 people (more with today's social media), but a guest with a resolved complaint will tell the same people how happy he/she was. Your call
What a d-bag.
If I might tack on to this, it's useless for ANYONE to loose the cool at a waiter. They aren't paid enough. If you are being paid minimum wage to bend over backwards to make people happy, you're not going to be motivated for very long to do your job well. Treat your waiter/waitress like a human and they'll be more than happy to bend over backwards to accommodate, treat them poorly and you'll end up like that pastor who became a pariah because she belittled a waitress over a few bucks on a tip.
So, 15 years as a rm very seldom complain. Now just say you are a stockholder.
I can not agree more. We do not go out often, nor as often as we used to. When we do go out, it is often to a family-style restaurant in which we are known.
The last time we had a problem, it was the result of a server who'd been on vacation, & a small change in the description on the menu while the server was away. We were not upset by the situation, as it could be resolved at the table, but the server was on-the-ball, the manager was at our table within five minutes (It was a busy evening). We received a complementary dessert.
They know us at this restaurant, know that we're not going to limit our tips to the recommended. We even make sure to offer a smaller tip to the bus-person who will be clearing, personally.
As a result, when the rare problem does rear it's ugly head, we know it will be handled immediately.
I will also get a manager if the service well above and beyond the usual. For instance, I was at seafood restaurant that has an all you can eat shrimp deal. The server did a fantastic job; not too hovery, not distant. At one point, some of us at the table said, "surprise us" with the next plate, and she brought out items that weren't even on the menu. 8 of us at the table were just so impressed with her that we had to get a manager to rave. She got well over $100 from our table.
I also love to tell the manager when they do great work. My daughter is a waitress, saving up for college, and I see first hand what they go through. I also over tip as long as the server wasn't rude. On a 4 buck ticket for one, I usually tip 5, waitresses generally don't like 1 toppers so I help out where I can.
Yup. We often e-mail a restaurant when we've received good service - not run-of-the-mill, but nice. Sometimes, it is a place we've not tried, before. EVERYONE needs an acknowledgment that they've done the job correctly. It encourages MORE good-works, in the hope of MORE positive recognition. A win-win.
Ya, thats right.
maybe, maybe not... but I'll bet she can figure out how to use the "reply" button if she wants to trash someone else's post.
I rarely complain in restaurants, but when I do it is because 1) I/we have been sitting there for 10 minutes or longer without any staff member coming by to even get drink requests or 2) something is not right with my order (last time that happened the chef neglected to put mushrooms on my 'burger even though I'd requested them. I try to make sure there is no question about my order and treat the staff nicely, it makes for a more pleasant dining experience.
If the customer who wanted his steak changed out asked for "no tomatoes" up front, then it's reasonable to change out the steak! He may be allergic to tomatoes, in which case the residue left behind from just taking that off the plate could cause serious harm. Even if he's not allergic, tomatoes do leave a distinct flavor behind when lifted from their surroundings – and that can make anyone who doesn't care for the flavor ill. I love tomatoes myself, and if he didn't make that specification when ordering then just removing the tomato seems like the right thing to do. Common sense for the moment and all that.
Well, that, or perhaps the tomato wasn't mentioned on the menu. I've had plenty of times where I have a dish brought out to me with cilantro as a garnish, and that hadn't been listed on the menu. I'm allergic to cilantro, and would have happily told you that ahead of time. I feel that in those cases, having it sent back is reasonable, as well.
I have three big issues when I eat out:
1. waiting more than 30 minutes for food that arrives warm to cool-I like it hot esp. after waiting
2. in summer if air conditioning is uncomfortable set high/cannot relax and enjoy the meal
3. if the establishment is too dark to read the menu or see what is on the plate or to sign the credit card voucher
I find myself going out to eat less and less these days-not only to save money but to protect myself from food bourne illness, lack of hand washing, and poor sanitation of dishes, utensils, hard surfaces
Just like in the hospitals, you never know where these tough strains of bacteria may show up-I try to be careful mostly for my health
I try to be tolerant and considerate esp. of the wait staff but if my food comes to me cold or I am miserably too cold to be comfortable I have to complain.
Complaining does not necessarily reflect the service or how I tip the waitress; i realize sometimes the kitchen environment affects the food temperature but the air conditioning can be adjusted.
However, I have traveled to remote places for a meal and had warmer dinner plates-it can be addressed!
It is a hard job-everyone should try it once
You seem very understanding. I will point out that, when I waited tables, I hated when someone would request to turn down the air conditioner. This is because I was moving around at a fast pace for hours on end, so I was very hot. I understand how uncomfortable it is to be in a restaurant when it is cold, but I would love it if people would consider bringing sweaters if they have a tendency to get cold. It makes a huge difference to the servers, who are sometimes near passing out from the heat on a busy night.
OK, we'll do it your way – we'll be glad to freeze our a**ses off because of an air conditioner going full blast,and have a miserable meal, happily pay for for the experience, and then tip you 20% for the honor of you allowing us to frequent the establishment in which you work to make sure that you are comfortable and we, the customer, are not.
Never complain at a restaurant if you still have food coming.
My wife used to work at one, and I know how the staff retaliates in the kitchen. Fingers in the food, spit in the water, piece of chicken dropped on the kitchen floor on purpose... Only bounded by the limits of imagination.
The tip allows you to have the last laugh if you really got stiffed. But remember that not everything is under your waiter's control.
And nothing more annoying than the customers who take advantage of their position of power to abuse, complain or flirt with waiters/waitresses.
I have great respect for that job. It is harsh, you walk all day, and it only takes one customer to behave like a jerk to ruin your day.
You have "great respect" for people who purposely adulterate food to "retaliate"? Your wife must have worked in a dive.
Typical woman, taking things way out of context...he never said he respected people who adulterate food.
Thanks Wright for setting the record straight.
Fiona... Dive or fancy restaurant, you don't want to mess with people who handle your food. I'm not saying it's right. And clearly, you have misplaced the respect I was referring to.
Once no more food is coming your way, have at it. Call the manager. Send a letter to President Obama if that tickles your fancy. But prior to food, be very tactful... Better swallow your pride than swallow the Herps
I was a waiter once. I took great pride in my job and did the best I could. What I learned is that people are reasonable and treat waiters who do a good job with respect. They also tip well. Bad waiters make the entire profession look bad. If a waiter screwed up, it basically means that he is not concentrating on his job. We are not talking about rocket-science here. Any monkey can be trained to be a waiter. What separates men from monkeys is the work-ethic that men are supposed to bring to the job. I am mean to bad waiters – because I was a waiter once and know what it takes to do a good job. A bad waiter is just being disrespectful. Hes disrespecting the food, the customer, the restaurant, his job and above all, he is disrespecting himself. So no harm in disrespecting him.
This person wrote they respect the occupation, not the retaliation. Are you a moron?
Please don't think for a moment that based on your wife's limited experience in restaurants, you can make a general assumption that the kitchen staff will retaliate. I'm not saying it hasn't been done, but in 30 years of working in kitchens, I've never seen it done. We will say mean things about you, but that's about it.
After formerly being in the customer service industry for years, I'm of the belief that the customer (especially the rude ones who love to whine and complain) are almost always wrong. Excellent article, and the for the posters below who don't agree, I wonder how much spit is in the food you order? Watch the movie "Waiting" and wake up, being kind and calm in these situations is always better than being a jacka$$, and that's all this waiter is really trying to stress.
Has anyone ever considered doping a blind date with Syrup of Ipecac? I'm almost certain one could get away with a free meal this way.
I'm German, I have no shame.
Great idea. You go first.
I recently noticed some worrisome hygiene issues at a restaurant I've eaten in many times. I wrote to the owner and shared my observations. I got an apologetic reply and an assurance that the cleaning practices would be changed.
why don't you just go somewhere else? who sends an email like that?
Sometimes it works. My dad had an issue with a wing joint because the managers were slobs who allowed the staff to leave the tables dirty for other customers (among other things). He wrote the district manager of the chain and not long after that the managers of that location were all replaced and it is now the model of cleanliness and efficiency.
With me it's soft poached eggs...
I cannot eat fried eggs, so I order them poached soft.
I have to send them back nine times out off ten.
I would just eat them hard cooked, but then a waitress told me if they weren't cooked the way I ordered them and I ate them anyway, it was my own damned fault.
It was tough, but, I learned to send them back.
Out of curiosity, why do you keep ordering them out if they're so rarely right? It just seems like a recipe for disappointment, like Charlie Brown and the football.
Someday I will master them at home...
http://eatocracy.cnn.com/2011/08/23/55-perfectly-poached-eggs/
I used to eat my steak really rare but have eventually grown more accustomed to it MR. But I was aware that it would often be cooked past what I liked, so I made sure to make a point with the wait person. If you know thy usually get it wrong, ordering without extra instructions seems like you have a chip on your shoulder and are looking for a fight.
BTW, poached eggs can be done to varying levels of yolk harness; it is the use of water in cooking them that makes them poached, not the amount of done ness.
I particularly enjoy waiters in the Dominican Republic. There was this one gorgeous waiter at a Punta Cana resort who tried to find my little man in the boat while my husband was looking at the bill.
I was shocked at first...but it did make me moist.
This WINS the comment section for this story. OVER!
As a woman with food allergies, I've seen that "It's just a tomato" issue so many times. See, I'm allergic to apples (and juices, and vinegar coming from juices). If I order a burger, it's "no pickles". If I order anything else with pickles, it's "no pickles". Pickles are in a LOT of things. And sometimes I forget, or I don't consider garnish – for example, just today I had to cut a small part of a grilled cheese sandwich off, because it had come in contact with the pickle they put on the plate.
I've had them forget to leave the pickle off, and when I complain they take the food away, take the offending item off, and return my food without replacing the things that came in contact with the pickle. If I notice it – and I don't always – I complain, refuse to pay (or ask for a refund) and leave. If I don't notice, I get sick, throw up at the table, THEN refuse to pay or ask for a refund.
Maybe you should simply explain your food allergies in a nice way.
Her health conditions aren't the waiter's business. If she says "no pickles", that's all he needs to know and she should get no pickles. It isn't that difficult.
That's understood, but if she sat there and said "ehhh...it's just the pickle," and wanted a whole new hamburger without an explanation as to why, I would question that too. Communication isn't a bad thing, people aren't mind readers.
Completely remaking the dish any time you get an ingredient wrong is assumed, and should be done 100% of the time. This is just basic customer service.
Actually, a guests "heath conditions" (more commonly known as allergies) are the waiter's business, especially if it is something that could potentially make the guest sick, or worse. Almost all restaurants understand this and IF THE GUEST COMMUNICATES they will do everything they can.
There is nothing wrong with a restaurant fixing an item instead of completely remaking it. Usually, if something has to be remade, the rest of the people in the party will be almost entirely done with their meal and that makes for an unusual dynamic for the whole group.
Many people think how dirty restaurant kitchens are but having worked in that business for many years, I can assure you that most are much cleaner than 99.9% of home kitchens.
There are a lot of cross contamination that goes on in restaurants too, tongs, spatulas– they'll flip fish, chicken and burgers at the same time (just as you would on your own grill at home). It's important to tell your server if you have a food allergy so that certain precautions will be upheld to insure your safety.
This is true but at the same time her plate of food is not the only one in the kitchen and it could come in contact with someone else's plate that has pickles on it and still have an allergic reaction to it. If you have a specific allergy to something then the server should be told about it. At the restaurant I work in the food is handled totally differently for someone who has an allergy. The manager makes it himself away from the rest of the food being cooked to avoid cross-contamination and hand delivers it to the table.
Big difference between having an allergy and just being a picky bu t t. Tell it like it is and get it the way you want.
That was my thought too. If the dude's freaking out that much over a tomato, he's probably allergic to it.
He's still a grown man and an exclamation of 'yuck' makes him look like a childish idiot. A waiter and a cook understand a food allergy and there is no shame or embarrassment to tell a waiter I am allergic to such-and-such, would you please tell me if there is any in what I have ordered. I have known people to do this for allergies and for religious reasons and I have never known waiters to take offence or treat it as an oddity. Any that would do that are not very professional or nice.
something sounds really wrong with you, you may want to get that checked out and perhaps NOT eat out at restaurants...JUST SAYIN
pickles are not in a lot of things they are in a lot of fast food however. which is my guess where you do most of your food preperations.
I am guessing you are the type of person that PURPOSELY asks for a meals with pickles hoping to get some attention.
Honesly the excuse "I forgot to ask to not have a food that I have known my entire life i am alergic to even thoguh the ingrediants are clearly on the menu" is 100% YOUR FAULT.
I thought the tomato thing sounded like a food aversion/phobia. For people who feel that way toward a food, its presence on - or the taste of its juices on - a food will make it inedible. The guy had a legitimate complaint. Why would a tomato slice be on a steak anyway? Covering up an ugly scorch mark?
On my road to vegetarianism, I went through a period of eating fish but no mammals or birds. I would tell servers my dietary limitation, and confirm with them that there was nothing but fish in my fish dish. Then the plate would come out and there was foie gras draped across, or lardoons used, or meat broth, or ground pork, etc. Even now that I am vegetarian, I will often have servers tell me they have vegetarian fish and chicken dishes. It's the job of the server to know what's in the dishes on the menu. It's not for them to decide that a customer just needs to get over it and eat what is served.
I'm allergic to shellfish (all lobster, crab and shrimp) and have found a few Asian restaurants that totally understand the issue of cross-contamination – like cooking my steak on a grill that was just used to cook shrimp. Much appreciated! But alot of American buffets serve crab salad along with pasta salad in their salad bar and customers interchange the serving ware between bowls. I went into anaphylactic shock (code blue) after an otherwise nice dinner and almost died. Although embarassing I make it crystal clear before I order and the wait staff has been kindly accomodating.
I was hospitalized because my server brought fish for me and shrimp for my husband on the same plate AFTER I explained my severe shrimp allergy. Brought back the dinners seperate – but no doubt were from the same plate. If you have never been on a ventilator in ICU I can personally recommend against it (been there done that) but that is how bad allergic shock can be. You cannot breathe. Period.
Why not carry an epi pen?
If seafood makes you this ill, you shouldn't eat at a restaurant that has anything to do with seafood.
You're right. Food allergies can be life threatening or fatal. It's not just a matter of something you don't like.
what do you mean 'if I don't notice"? It seems to me if something would force me to "vomit at the table", I'd make sure it wasn't in the burger before I ate the whole thing, and then vomited it up at the table.
Drama queen.
Sometimes it is not visibly obvious that they just removed the item instead of remaking the entire plate. I think that's what was meant. Not that they didn't look. But sometimes for instance you can remove a pickle and not leave a visible clue that it had been there.
After formerly being in the customer service industry for years, I'm of the belief that the customer (especially the rude ones who love to whine and complain) are almost always wrong. Excellent article, and the for the posters below who don't agree, I wonder how much spit is in the food you order? Watch the movie "Waiting" and wake up, being kind and calm in these situations is always better than being a jackass, and that's all this waiter is really trying to stress.
Can't feel for this waiter. If the dad-of-many is complaining every single time he comes into your restaurant – maybe it's not because his "voice is never anywhere else" (what an insane assumption). Maybe it's because you're messing up. Large parties with multiple kids can be rough to get right, I did my time as a waiter in college, so if there's always a complaint maybe you should check your own performance.
This author sounds like one of those guys who really resents being stuck in the service industry and takes it out on his customers.
No, I think the author got it right. Would you keep going back to a restaurant if they always screwed up your order or made other mistakes that ruined your evening? Of course not.
I sat at the bar at PF Chang's for an hour and was ignored. Bartender kept saying they'd get to me. There wasn't a chance to complain to my waiter in this case.
You should have found someone else working there to help you. Sitting there for an hour and not being helped is definitely ridiculous but why would you sit there for so long without saying anything?
Once I was out for a good meal and a nice time. I had an idiot waiter trying to hit on my date. I wanted to take off my
napkin and take him outside to make his face bloody rare. Absolutely no class. How this narcissistic mole got hired
is beyond me-it wasn't L.A.
...You're eating at my restaurant for one of Three reasons.... You can't cook to save your life. You're too lazy to cook for yourself on that particular occasion.... or you need to impress someone by bringing them to an award winning exclusive eatery... who's doing who the favor here? Your lasagna cant get you head but mine can. You are the help. now spend monkeys, spend
You're awfully uppity for an Olive Garden employee.
6. If you are unlucky enough to be seated at this cynical, sour, misanthropic waiter's table: get up, walk out, do not leave a tip, and find a better place to eat. Good restaurants hire good servers.
Once I was on a date with a guy who drank too much.
He ended up passing out at the table of a very nice restaurant. The waiter was concerned and asked me to get him out of the dining area. I told him "Look...you served him the drinks. It would appear he is dead now. It's your problem."
I got up from my seat, threw my napkin down, picked up my wine glass...took a drink and then knocked the table over and screamed "Don't ever touch my breasts again!!!"
Best Exit EVER!!!
My, my...I suppose you are still single. Such a little treasure.
Note – Don't date Margaret, she'll try to frame you for sexual harassment.
LOL, that is an awesome exit
Note – Don't date Margaret, she'll try to frame you for harassment.
this story of yours seems fake, but thanks for the fictional account
If a prostitute can love unicorns as a child, I truly believe a woman can...at some point in her life...be so distraught by a drunken date that she would indeed turn over a table and have an outburst.
I believe this story 100%
I don't understand why a prostitute would love unicorns. Oh wait. I get it. Still think the story is fantasy, though.
Margaret...pics of your breasts or GTFO!
(*) (*)
Wow I hope you get fired for this article. Sure some customers are out of line but so are a lot of waiters. Also many restaurants would like to hear the complaints rather then what I and many people do who get rude waiters and bad service which is NEVER go back. Maybe if you got off your high horse your industry wouldnt have a 90% failure rate in the first year. You should be the one acting fast not me and NO I do not trust you
I tend not to complain. If I don't like something, I just leave. It's really so much easier to leave than to speak to someone who makes minimum wage.
You must life a closed off life if you think waiters or anyone else who makes minimum wage can not help you if the situation requires it. Open your mind!
Ya know what? It's the customer's prerogative to dictate whether a tomato ever touches his plate. Who the hell are you to pass judgment on him? You're the goddamned HELP. Learn your place and maybe you'll get a good tip.
That steak story reminded me of a meal I had in a snazzy-snooty hotel dining room at the Bel Air Hotel. I was a young teen at the time - out on the town for a memorable birthday celebration - and ordered a fish that came (gorgeously arranged, I am sure) head and tail on, and draped in anchovies. My eyes must have gotten big when the plate was put before me, because the waiter wordlessly whisked the plate aside and deftly removed head, tail, anchovies and all bones, and presented it to me again...still attractively arranged.
THAT is a waiter.
This guy who writes anonymously is a hash slinger at best.
Take it easy. This isn't Downton Abbey, it's a restaurant.
Typically if you treat the server like a person, they'll treat you like a person. If there is something that is a big deal to you (tomatoes) let them know and it will get taken care of. If you treat them like the 'goddamn help' don't be surprised if they treat you like their asshole boss.
Did Santa leave you a piece of coal in your christmas stocking again? tsk tsk
Wouldn't it be great if Americans still knew how to be civil and polite so that articles like these were unnecessary?
95% of the time when I have had to complain in a restaurant it's ABOUT the waiter
Yes, because the author of this article is the epitome of politeness. Ridiculing people who complain about things that he feels are trivial and/or unreasonable. We should aspire to emulate such good manners.
It's new generation of young people who are striving to better their stations in life by having a waiter job while going to
school or in between other jobs, need the part time income, etc. In older days, it was an out right profession that included more of a measure of pride and professionalism. But as mentioned, it can be a 2 way street- an occasional customer can be the pits. Having been a waiter that got me through college many years ago, I can smell a flake waiter a mile away. I always give them every measure of respect until blatantly disrespected by sloppy, inconsiderate service.
The waiter works in Belfast, not in the States.
If you saw the movie, "Waiting ...", you might think twice about sending something back.
If there is something wrong with the meal, by that I mean obviously wrong, then I will ask the waiter to solve the problem. As I am not fussy, that rarely happens. There was never an instance in which I found it necessary to yell, raise my voice, or even be snide to the waiter. Actually, I make it a point to compliment them, call them by name, and thank them for their work. I find that making them feel appreciated goes a long way to having them give service above and beyond the norm.
if I don't get from the waiter what I want. I get to complain about what ever I want and my tip will reflect your performance. I thought this article was a joke !! Do your job my friend. If I don't like the food go and get me what I like.
When you complain about the complainers, you are no better than they are.
Don't like the annoying bits that come along with your job? Then fine, quit, and let someone else do it.
Unfortunately in today's day and age people need to be taught proper restaurant etiquette. But it is a two way street.
@aroth. Asking people to act civil while in public is not a "complaint." It's freakin' human decency. There's nothing wrong with the content of this article...there's something wrong with the fact that someone had to say it in the first place.
@Scott – So then I assume you basically skipped over the part of the article where the author ridicules past clients for complaining about things the he feels are stupid, and complains about how stressful it is having to deal with them?
No. I just recognize that people complaining about stupid crap aren't being particularly civil, and SHOULD be told to calm themselves.
Just because it's someone's job to deal with customers doesn't mean people have carte blanche to treat them like crap. The article doesn't say people can't have public complaints. It tells them how to be civil about those complaints.
Or maybe we should ridicule you for complaining about the guy "complaining" about his customers complaining?
I don't go back
I try my best not to complain. Even when things don't seem right (hubby and I have been waiting 25 minutes for a refill on coffee in a half empty restaurant? UGH) instead of complaining, I figure kill the waiter with kindness, but do comment on the speed of service ("Thank you sooo much for the refill, today has just been waaaaaay too long of a day" big.effing.smile).
I have actually been embarassed recently, going out with my father and stepmother, who made a BIG stink in an extremely busy restaurant because they didn't clear the salad plates before bringing out dinner (they made the switch at the same time). We were a big party (10 of us!) and the complaint was really overdramatic (thank you step-cow erm, mom). Plus she complained that we were seated by the restroom, when in reality we weren't really that close to it! I pulled the waiter aside at the end of the evening and apologized... It was soo rude!
Wow do you have some step-mommy issues. I'd have to say from your post there was no way is hell she was going to do anything right.
"The sea was angry that day, my friend. Like an old man trying to send back soup in a deli." George Costanza
"No soup for you." Soup Nazi
I've rarely complained, food is usually good enough, meaning what I expect for the price I pay.
But 1 & 3 are probably the best advice.
Places that will bother me though to no end:
1) Resturants who think they can sell Kobe beef. If you aren't in Japan you aren't selling Kobe beef. If I see it on your menu you are telling me you think I am stupid. I will tip accordingly and annotate exactly why on the erceipt. If you call me a moron why should I tip well?
2) Any resturant where there is a sharp sour smell. If your bar sink is the source clean it up, if your drains are the source clena them up. In general clean up the resturant. My house doesn't smell of rot, the resturant shouldn't either (Red Lobster looking at you).
3) Tell me I'm wrong because the chef has decided to redefine cuisine to their standards.. Look I got it, I ordered it Medium-Rare, I did not know you were going to serve me a just above body temperature slab of purple meat. So when I ask you to go ahead and make it medium (so I will at get what the rest of the universe consisders a medium-rare steak) and you bring it back just this side of charcoal don't be surprised when I'm walking out the door.
wow...Kobe means that much to you eh??
You sound like the guy who doesn't get heard at home...
Kobe Beef is actually an expensive piece of meet. Restaurants around U.S.A Have been trying to Name their beef meet "Kobe beef". Kobe beef Is actually up to $300+ for 12 oz. But yet restaurants are selling "Kobe" beef for $20 – 10 oz. more than 12,000 Restaurants have been shut down due to this (in the USA alone) and 21000 SUED.
It's ok to say Kobe-style beef. That's honest.
If you want to educate me on the fine art of eating Kobe Beef at least call it meAt and not meet.
You may want to get your facts straight before ranting. However, I will give you the benefit of the doubt and assume you have seen Kobe beef offered prior to this new regulation change.
http://www.forbes.com/sites/larryolmsted/2012/09/28/kobe-beef-is-back-new-rules-allow-some-japanese-beef-in-u-s/
why would you take your kobe beef frustration out on the server's tip? if you've got an issue, contact the manager. don't take it out on the poor guy making $2.33 an hour. he hustles plates around all night, he doesn't create the menu nor does he decide what products are offered or how they're presented.
Some people have the mistaken belief that punishing the waiter/ress by withholding a tip will buy them karma points or something.
Some people have the mistaken belief that punishing the waiter/ress by withholding a tip for a meal they didn't like will buy them karma points or something.
sorry... forgot the qualifying part of my comment.
These days people usually refer to it as Wagyu beef.
There is a difference between Kobe beef and Wagyu beef. Kobe is a region and the beef is named after the region it is raised in. Wagyu is a breed of cattle. Google if you don't believe.
I rarely complain, it just makes me uncomfortable at a restaurant and I always suspect they'll spit in my food if I do. It makes me cringe how some people treat wait staff. My VP in my office, every holiday meal we have as a team he treats the staff as his personal servants. He gets drunk and then bitches about something so minor. He orders a gin and tonic "with no green stuff" instead of saying no lime. So he gets a lime every time. You;d think his dumba$$ would figure that out. He has even talked with pride how hard he is on wait staff and one of his lickspittle toadies emulates him.
The way I see it, these people are human like you and I. And make less money than I do and put up with more crud than I do (really the general public is just horrible). So whan I complain I do it calmly and quietly and ask for their help to resolve an issue. And it gets taken care of. If the food and service is just that bad, then we don't come back,
Life is too short to be a d!ck all of the time. Save it for people from Alabama, nobody likes Tide fans so treat them accordingly. ;)
Gin and Tonic without a lime bit? That tells us all we need to know about this man.
There was this guy at a restaurant the other day. Instead of being nice and gently reminding the waitress he didn't get his bacon he went in to a tirade, continuing on for ten minutes, lil snips here and there. The cook said "we are very sorry, it happens occasionally"..>The guy said, "why does it always happen to me" My friend at the back of the restaurant called out "maybe because your an A hole."....Before we left, he was still grousing.. I noticed he was a contractor by his truck with big logo in the parking lot. I came up to him and asked him if he had a business card, he gave it eagerly and he asked if I wanted some work done. I said no, but that facebook and review boards would be a great way to tell people how he treats the general public, after all he didn't care he was torturing the kitchen staff, embarrasing his workmate, and making the rest of us restaurant patrons annoyed. His face turned white, I smiled and walked away. Priceless.
Excellent article! If you work in the restaurant industry you most definitely have a unique set of skills in your arsenal ( or apron). Great wait staff showcase the patience of Job coupled with a customer-centric attitude. With every unnecessary or downright ridiculous complaint they bite their tounge, smile and offer to rectify the situation in any way possible.
At the end of the day it comes down to the concept of mutual respect. The server must not trivialize a customer's complaint and the customer must respect the server and address complaints calmly.
After working in the industry for over seven years I've seen it all! No matter what, you must understand there will always be a "bad" customer and a "bad" server. However, take the high road and aim to become the best server! I always remember the customer that grinded my gears, and sometimes I like to think they go home and feel sorry for being rude. If I see the customers again they sometimes look ashamed when they recognize me. However, I also run into those who are ready to give me another spout about how the lasagna didn't have enough meat suace and I should tell the chef to get it right this time! Every time my response is the same... I am truly sorry for the inconvenience last time, I rememember the mistake, and I will personally make sure etc. etc... The key is to let them know you remember the incident. They will respect your effort, or feel guilty for their previous outburst. If they never return at least I may have struck a chord that will change the way they complain to the next server.
Classy attitude. You're on another level. I hope you're my waiter the next time I dine out.
When you go into a restaurant, it is their responsibility to give you a good meal, good service, and an enjoyable experience. They depend on you coming back, and word of mouth to others. When you have a bad experience, and they don't rectify it, they lose in the long run. Now, you will always get that customer who is never happy about anything, but you bite your lip, and try to make it right by them. As consumers, if the restaurant is bad, we just don't go back.
Here's a hint to the guys out there: Your date WILL notice how you treat the staff. Be on your absolute best game, and NEVER be rude or condescending to servers or staff.
This public service announcement brought to you by the AD Council.
You have a very good point, Truth. We also watch how you treat your Mothers and sisters, too.
Mr. Truth is absolutely correct. And so will your boss or client or whomever you're eating with.
On the other hand, when something is clearly wrong, not complaining makes a bad impression on your companion too. But, how you do it will determine whether the resulting impression is good or bad.
Went to lunch with a group that included a guy who snapped his fingers at the waiter and then asked for menus as if the waiter was five years old. I never went to lunch with that guy again. For him it wasn't about lunch but about making a statement about his own self-importance.
Was the guy Mexican or Hispanic? I have observed from personal experience that that behavior is normal in Mexico.
Manuel T. Waiter, I feel you. I was never in food service, but I did work retail for about six years. Some people just aren't happy unless they're mad. The customer isn't always right, and it's a very tough thing to make things right for a wrong person while gritting your teeth and smiling. Of course you get the occasional exception you get to tell no or even leave the establishment!