Kate Krader (@kkrader on Twitter) is Food & Wine's restaurant editor. When she tells us where to find our culinary heart's desire, we listen up.

On Valentine’s Day, the question isn’t whether you’re going to eat any chocolate; the question is how much? If you need something to strive for, the record for the world’s largest chocolate heart is waiting to be broken: It was set back in 2004 in Madrid, by the seven metric ton heart from Match.com.

But there are infinite kinds of chocolate to indulge in on this great holiday; you don’t need to confine yourself to hearts. The following is a gift guide for all kinds of chocolate lovers, from the pizza fanatics to the sports junkies to the very, very rich.

For the Sporty Chocolate Lover
The Chocolate Vault doesn’t just sell tennis rackets in milk, dark or white chocolate (they arrive, appropriately, on a bed of fake grass). The shop also can supply you with chocolate tennis balls. And if your Valentine goes all out for the Oscars, you can order chocolate statuettes here, too.

For the Chocolate-Loving Pizza Fanatic
Sugar Plum Chocolates creates chocolate pizzas. Its Traditional Chocolate Pizza ($43) boasts a milk chocolate base topped with grated white chocolate (the cheese) plus pepperoni, mushrooms and green pepper, all made from chocolate. To amp up its pizza-ness, it’s delivered in a traditional cardboard pizza delivery box. Anyone wanting to send a pizza to their father for Valentine’s Day can get Dad’s pizza, which is topped with four chocolate mini beer mugs and a chocolate remote.

For the Photo Geek Chocolate Lover
The Bay Area-based amateur chocolatier Hans Chung makes replicas of the Canon D60 camera to order from five pounds of super-deluxe Guittard chocolate. He explains the $500 price tag: “I buy a real camera and a real lens. Then I make a mold. The camera is pretty much destroyed in the process. Making a mold of something so intricate is not easy nor cheap. The mold required to achieve this level of detail does not last beyond 10 copies. After 10 copies, some details start to fade away. Each camera takes about five hours of tempering and pouring. I only have a small chocolate tempering machine.”

For the Nostalgic Chocolate Lover
For Valentine’s Day, Liddabit is making Chocomallows, its version of the cult classic cookie Mallomars. Liddabit tops salted cocoa cookies with fluffy vanilla marshmallow, and covers the whole thing in dark chocolate.

For Sexy Chocolate Lovers
Haute Chocolate, a tiny chocolate shop in Winston-Salem, North Carolina, is introducing Sexual Chocolate truffles. They’re made from Foothills Brewery’s Sexual Chocolate Stout (a beloved local brew), along with banana, passion fruit and star anise, all in dark chocolate. The sexy chocolate truffles will be available for about four weeks, then they’re gone until next year.

For the Billionaire Chocolate Lover
Knipschildt Chocolatier in Norwalk, Connecticut, makes La Madeline au Truffe–at $250 per truffle (or $2,600 per pound), it’s among the most expensive chocolates in the entire world. Why is it thousands of dollars? The center is a French Périgord truffle mushroom; the mushroom is covered with luxe dark chocolate ganache infused with truffle oil, then covered with more dark chocolate. It’s delivered on a bed of sugar pearls.

For Chocolate Lovers Who Might Love Cupcakes Even More
Seattle’s mini chain Cupcake Royale sells its Deathcake Royale for a limited time, up until February 14. The intense cakes are topped with Stumptown espresso chocolate ganache, a pinch of sea salt and a little red heart to signify the holiday. The Deathcake 3-Packs ($17) can be shipped around the country and come with the enticing message, Love You to Death.

More from Food & Wine:

Best Chocolate in the U.S.

America’s Best Date Restaurants

World’s Most Romantic Cities

Best Cupcakes in the U.S.

Valentine’s Day Recipes

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