Stephanie V.W. Lucianovic is a Bay Area writer and editor. Her first book Suffering Succotash: A Picky Eater's Quest to Understand Why We Hate the Foods We Hate, is a humorous non-fiction narrative and exposé on the lives of picky eaters. She previously coerced Anderson Cooper to overcome his dining issues and told us the most scientifically delicious snack shape.
In my years-long quest to put my picky eating into remission, I'm proud to say that I had a list of once-hated green vegetables jockeying for attention at my Thanksgiving table this year. The two that won out are okra (simply sautéed and salted to perfection) and Brussels sprouts, which will be peeled down to individual leaves, sautéed with garlic, then gilded with a balsamic vinaigrette and a smattering of walnuts to comprise a warm salad.
However, there are still some turkey day foods out there that get my gorge a-rising and chief among them is that Thanksgiving staple of my Minnesota childhood: green bean casserole.
I might occasionally eat green beans raw and tossed with an intensely garlicky pesto, but you can be quite sure I will not eat them after they’ve been turned that very special shade of grey-green unique to dead vegetables and swamped in a cream sauce with unidentifiable brown boluses and pale slices of water chestnuts of all things.
“They’re for the crunch!” someone once told me. You want crunch? How about, oh I don’t know, not cooking the green beans denture-soft‽
Now the grey-green beans in this dish are bad enough, but it was truly all over for me the first time I got a look at the secret ingredient keeping its gelatinous shape after it had been slurped out of the can and into the waiting saucepan. Note to special effects folks: nothing looks so much like actual barf than a cold can of mushroom soup, it’s got chunks and everything!
(I'm also not the biggest fan of pumpkin pie ever since my older sister likened it to cat vomit but I am a kind host, so it will be there for the guest who adores it.)
What's the Thanksgiving dish you simply dread? Please share your tales of taste and texture traumas in the comments below and we'll share them in an upcoming post.
Previously - The psychology of food aversions and Food aversions: Your questions answered and A five-step plan for overcoming picky eating (a.k.a. an open letter to Anderson Cooper)
All our best Thanksgiving advice and recipes
After I initially commented I appear to have clicked on the -Notify me when new comments are added- checkbox and now each time a comment is added I receive four emails with the same comment. There has to be a way you can remove me from that service? Thank you.
Here's a tip for all the pumpkin pie haters. use the standard libby's pumpkin pie recipe on the can, but double the spices! twice as much cinnamon, ginger, and cloves will make an awesome pie, not a bland, tasteless mess you have to force yourself to eat.
To be Honest….I Dread having to clean All the dishes that my Family leaves behind.
I love sweet potatoes. However, I LOATHE it when people add sugar or marshmallows to a perfectly good food that is plenty sweet enough on its own. Save the marshmallows to burn up over a campfire, please!
I watched Vivian Howard's show ("A Chef's Life") on PBS and learned ALOT about sweet potatoes. Fantastic!
This guy is a moron just trying to make himself sound sophisticated.
Which "guy" are you referring to? The author is female and I think "sophistication" is furthest from her mind here.
I'm with the author on this one. Green bean casserole is one dish that will never cross my lips. And I like almost everything!
LOVE just LOVE green bean casserole!!!!!
I'll eat my share of fresh green beans drowned in Campbell's Cream of Mushroom Soup and sprinkled with French's French Fried Onions (just before serving). Make extra because they are pretty tasty on Friday too.
Gross ! Its probably ok without the canned soup . . .
Breaking News: Snooty Foody Dislikes Something That Most Regular People Enjoy!
I wonder if she has trouble eating her dinner from way up on her high horse.
Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.
Join 8,111 other followers