Stephanie V.W. Lucianovic is a Bay Area writer and editor. Her first book Suffering Succotash: A Picky Eater's Quest to Understand Why We Hate the Foods We Hate, is a humorous non-fiction narrative and exposé on the lives of picky eaters. She previously coerced Anderson Cooper to overcome his dining issues and told us the most scientifically delicious snack shape.
In my years-long quest to put my picky eating into remission, I'm proud to say that I had a list of once-hated green vegetables jockeying for attention at my Thanksgiving table this year. The two that won out are okra (simply sautéed and salted to perfection) and Brussels sprouts, which will be peeled down to individual leaves, sautéed with garlic, then gilded with a balsamic vinaigrette and a smattering of walnuts to comprise a warm salad.
However, there are still some turkey day foods out there that get my gorge a-rising and chief among them is that Thanksgiving staple of my Minnesota childhood: green bean casserole.
“They’re for the crunch!” someone once told me. You want crunch? How about, oh I don’t know, not cooking the green beans denture-soft‽
Now the grey-green beans in this dish are bad enough, but it was truly all over for me the first time I got a look at the secret ingredient keeping its gelatinous shape after it had been slurped out of the can and into the waiting saucepan. Note to special effects folks: nothing looks so much like actual barf than a cold can of mushroom soup, it’s got chunks and everything!
(I'm also not the biggest fan of pumpkin pie ever since my older sister likened it to cat vomit but I am a kind host, so it will be there for the guest who adores it.)
What's the Thanksgiving dish you simply dread? Please share your tales of taste and texture traumas in the comments below and we'll share them in an upcoming post.
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