June 16th, 2011
09:15 AM ET
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One night at a party, many years back, talk turned - as it often does at the very best soirees - to incumbent governors of Massachusetts. I've always asserted that the friend with whom I was chatting that fateful evening could, if he so chose, pass for member of the Kennedy family. Fine head of hair on that kid to this very day, and so I just assume everything that comes from his mouth as pertains to Bay State politics to be indisputable fact.

"Mint Romney," he said, "Will run for president someday."

Of course he said "Mitt," but I was a toddy or two past that sort of linguistic distinction, and the idea became fixed in my head. Since then, every time I hear the now-candidate's name, I can't help but think of what the ice cream craftsmiths at Ben & Jerry's - creators of Stephen Colbert's Americone Dream and the now-classic Cherry Garcia - would make of the current field of Republican contenders for the highest office in the land.

The kickoff of the Presidential debates earlier this week did nothing to stifle my madness, nor did ideas and eggings-on from co-workers like This Just In editor Mallory Simon and my boss Cybil Wallace. I've gone ahead and gotten Mint Mitt Romney, Tim Pawlenty, Newt Gingrich, Herman Cain and Sarah Palin's flavors out of my system in the gallery above, and now it's your turn.

Share your best faux ice cream flavor names for the remaining Republican presidential candidates (we're all stuck on what to do with Michele Bachmann) - keep 'em respectful and rated PG - and you just might see them illustrated in the next edition of Rocky Road to the White House.



soundoff (171 Responses)
  1. Santo Aderholt

    The meaning of the phrase "ice cream" varies from one country to another. Phrases such as "frozen custard", "frozen yogurt", "sorbet", "gelato" and others are used to distinguish different varieties and styles. In some countries, such as the United States, the phrase "ice cream" applies only to a specific variety, and most governments regulate the commercial use of the various terms according to the relative quantities of the main ingredients.

    May 13, 2013 at 7:36 pm | Reply
  2. Raspberry Pi

    Merci pour ce joli blog. C'est tres bien.

    February 27, 2013 at 3:05 am | Reply
  3. Dern Foley

    If Herman Cain was an ice cream sundae – the flavor would be OREO COOKIE

    October 18, 2011 at 7:40 pm | Reply
    • Tom J

      When Blacks in this country stop thinking being well educated and successful is being an "oreo cookie", they will finally be free.

      October 18, 2011 at 11:17 pm | Reply
  4. Patch

    John Hunnyman – Ice cream sundae with honey

    June 21, 2011 at 10:38 am | Reply
  5. guest

    Larry Craig's All Men Joy

    June 18, 2011 at 5:20 pm | Reply
  6. Newo

    sheesh, you right wingers need to lighten up, it's ice cream, it's silly. The irrational, hateful rhetoric spewed by some of these commentators is precisely why I'm a conservative that can't stand Republicans.

    June 17, 2011 at 4:36 pm | Reply
  7. XWngLady

    C'mon Republican you can't tell me that you don't think that that mint green on Romney's head is funny? or the Gingrich one? I mean c'mon. For two seconds, can't you just laugh. You know you can't look at that mint swirl and not laugh?? :-)

    June 17, 2011 at 4:02 pm | Reply
  8. XWngLady

    Oh, but NO! You thought Obama Welfare Bucks with fried chicken and Kool-Aid and dressed as an African witch woctor, a monkey and a p1mp was HILARIOUS and "just a joke" and that "libtard" should get a sense of humor. Or even better you pulled out the First Amendment whole, freedom of "speech" spiel.....But THIS you don't find funny? If it had been one with just Obama as a half chocolate half vanilla scoop with a white swirl on top that looked like a turban on his head, you would have been rofl....humorless bunch of hypocrites..

    June 17, 2011 at 3:59 pm | Reply
  9. alex

    Where's the Obama flavor? You know the one in a waffle cone filled with bull sh1t

    June 17, 2011 at 10:53 am | Reply
    • Stew Pedassle@alex

      C'mon. You could say that about any politician. Try being original.

      June 17, 2011 at 11:00 am | Reply
    • guest

      Calm down with a David Vitter Diaper Delight.

      June 18, 2011 at 5:22 pm | Reply
  10. Welder

    Hey, various prog douchenozzles, Comrade Zero has us now involved in 4 wars.

    Had it not been for "enhanced interrogations", a base in Afghanistan and an expanded special forces cadre (all done under Bush), your boy narcissist would still be looking under golf carts for OBL.

    The Zero is gone in 2012.

    June 16, 2011 at 9:36 pm | Reply
  11. sgtzim

    How about we name all the fruitcakes at CNN after the turds they resemble most from the Bristol stool chart.
    That would be hilarious.
    Partisan hacks.

    June 16, 2011 at 9:30 pm | Reply
  12. Name*Jay McC

    Obana Ice Cream – DoucheTracks

    June 16, 2011 at 9:28 pm | Reply
  13. Iloveicecream!

    Michele Bach-"Monster Cherry Mash" or Michelle Oba-"Monster Cherry Mash". Maraschino cherries, peanuts, and chocolate - I don't care who it's named after, I would eat that (and I bet Bobby/Boris would too - if you don't get the reference I'm probably a lot older than you)!

    June 16, 2011 at 5:38 pm | Reply
  14. FLL Babs

    How about "Bachmann Truffle Overdrive" for Michelle Bachmann?

    June 16, 2011 at 4:27 pm | Reply
  15. TrekkieGT

    How about the Michele Bachmann Twin Peaks Ice Cream Log Lady Roll. But then again, they're all Nutty Buddies....

    June 16, 2011 at 2:27 pm | Reply
  16. Kevin

    Let's see... you've got your classic vanilla, french vanilla, fat free vanilla, soy vanilla, organic vanilla, and vanilla bean flavours.

    Gotta love the having the illusion of choice!

    June 16, 2011 at 2:12 pm | Reply
  17. Kelly

    Since Michele Bachmann is from Minnesota and a darling of the Tea Party, what about "Michele Bachmann's Twin City Tea Party Twist"? Lemon and rasberry flavored ice cream (also popular flavors in iced tea) would be a fun twist on the usual chocolate/vanilla twist.

    June 16, 2011 at 2:11 pm | Reply
  18. Squid

    Now everyone has to vote for Ron Paul because he is the only candidate who isn't ice cream.

    June 16, 2011 at 2:07 pm | Reply
  19. Y'all'r Missing It....

    GOP ice cream = Whopper from the Right

    The label on the container shows chocolate ice cream with halved malted milk balls in it. But you open it and it's really vanilla with chopped malted milk balls instead. Representative of the lies told by the GOP.

    Disclaimer: this is not to say that 'Crats don't lie. Just staying on topic.

    June 16, 2011 at 2:00 pm | Reply
  20. JohnDorian

    Did you notice that Sarah Palin's dessert outfit makes her look like Medusa?

    WTG, CNN! How appropriate...

    I agree with the rest of you that the Repubs are being over represented here. Time to tune into Fox News to see what they have to say about the subject. AKKK!!! My brain is about to deflate, and my IQ is draining away right before my eyes from all the ignorance, arrogance, and rhetoric! Switch it back to CNN, quick!

    June 16, 2011 at 1:43 pm | Reply
  21. Raging Conservative

    I'm a republican but yall people bashing on CNN make me insane. THIS IS A FOOD BLOG. Its called EATOCRACY. you make me upset that you are supporters of my party. yall are filled with hate as if us GOPers never criticize the other party. I saw the debate and none of it seemed about how to get us out of this deficit it was all about bashing obama. He's not the worst thing to happen since the NAZIs. He's a president. He can be voted out. He has a congress he needs to get things passed through and the house at least is majority opposition. Premier Obama you guys should be ashamed of yourselves. If you don't want to read about ice cream dont read a FRIGGING FOOD BLOG. you look stupid calling liberals mindless drones. Robots? More like people. Grow up.

    June 16, 2011 at 1:19 pm | Reply
    • Worldwalker

      Thank you for the injection of common sense. There seems to be a disturbing shortage of it around here lately.

      June 16, 2011 at 1:48 pm | Reply
    • james

      Thank you for making clear what this was intended to be. But it is not on the web as a food blog for me it was labled as a featured news article by Sprint. There are many paths to the same destination on the net.

      June 16, 2011 at 2:31 pm | Reply
      • Raging Conservative

        James I dont know what it looks like on sprint but the humongous header on my PC that takes up almost half of my screen says "Eatocracy" in an unmistakeably noticeable Pink. If you read the article than you should read more than just the content but what section of the web its on especially if you are coming from one of the "many paths."

        June 16, 2011 at 2:57 pm | Reply
      • Jerv@Raging Conservative

        Hear, hear!

        June 16, 2011 at 3:02 pm | Reply
      • james

        It was listed as a CNN news link on my phone Cable News Network and even though it is a food blog it is about politics and copied from Fox where O'RIELLY called one of the Reps Vanila ice cream last Friday. Also mobile browsers may not show all you see on a desktop or laptop, and when you bring politics into food what would you expect even the writer days to keep the comments pg knowing what he was getting started.

        June 16, 2011 at 5:46 pm | Reply
      • Worldwalker

        Reload the page. There are several alternating headers (a lemon slice, lettuce leaves, etc.) and they're all better than that pink thing.

        June 16, 2011 at 5:49 pm | Reply
  22. LKT

    Gary Johnson Green Chili Ice Cream - unusual, full of local flavor and something that the majority of folks wouldn't even TRY because they are so closed minded.

    June 16, 2011 at 1:11 pm | Reply
  23. ted

    All of the seven republican dwarfs on stage in Manchester NH last Tuesday are dorks. All rhetoric and no solutions to the ills of our country. We have to blah blah blah do something to correct the last 2.5 years of Democrats running the country blah blah blah. HEY – Obama was handed a shit sandwich from Bush with the TARP, IRAQ, Afghanistan, economy in the toilet. So what do you expect? It takes time to undo the wrongheaded policies of Bush/Cheney. AGain, none of the seven musketeers had any solutions. Just blah blah blah. So put their heads on cow pies and be done with it.

    June 16, 2011 at 1:10 pm | Reply
  24. herpderples

    Ron Paul 2012 Sundae.
    Tastes like freedom.

    June 16, 2011 at 1:07 pm | Reply
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