Snowpocalypse! Snowmageddon! SNOMG! Whatever portmanteau your local news outlet uses to panty-bunch about major winter weather events, odds are they bury the lede like a Mini Cooper in the path of a city plow. I won't: FREE FOOD is FALLING from the SKY.
Here's how to get your blizzard buffet on for a fraction of the price of Haagen-Dazs Dulce de Leche and feel like you're Laura Ingalls Wilder, hardscrabbling out on the Dakota Territory, minus the outhouse and pig bladder balloons.
The moment you notice snow falling, set the bowl outside in a spot you're sure is out of any animals' splash zones. Sure, you could brush some from the top of a car, but this ensures the cleanest, fluffiest flakes. When the bowl is nearly full, bring it inside.
Here's where the measurements get a tad fuzzy but hey - you're cooking with snow. It's not like you're meting out saffron threads and truffles by the microgram.
Open the sweetened condensed milk and with a spatula, gently, thoroughly fold about a third of the contents into the snow until it's thoroughly mixed. Keep adding condensed milk until the mixture is as rich as you'd like. Then stir in the vanilla, a half teaspoon at a time, until the taste is to your liking. Spoon into bowls, serve immediately.
If you'd like a slightly less creamy version, ditch the sweetened condensed milk and replace it with a mixture of one cup milk and one half cup sugar.
Yes, we are aware that many folks find snow gross and toxic. Others don't. Make at your own risk.
Try "Little House on the Prairie"-sanctioned Hailstone Ice Cream or Snow Candy and read "The Little House Cookbook: Frontier Foods from Laura Ingalls Wilder's Classic Stories."
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